Address Of Beelzebub(1 / 1)

addressofbeelzebub
  totherighthonourabletheearlofbreadalbane,presidentoftherighthonourableandhonourablethehighlandsociety,whichmetonthe23rdofmaylastattheshakespeare,coventgarden,toconcertwaysandmeanstofrustratethedesignsoffivehundredhighlanders,who,asthesocietywereinformedbymr.m'kenzieofapplecross,weresoaudaciousastoattemptanescapefromtheirlawfullordsandmasterswhosepropertytheywere,byemigratingfromthelandsofmr.macdonaldofglengarytothewildsofcanada,insearchofthatfantasticthing—liberty.
  longlife,mylord,an'heahbeyours,
  unskaithedbyhunger'dhighlandboors
  lordgrantmenaeduddie,desperatebeggar,
  wi'dirk,claymore,andrustytrigger,
  maytwinauldscotlando'alife
  shelikes—asbutcherslikeaknife.
  faithyouandapplecrosswereright
  tokeepthehighlandhoundsinsight:
  idoubtna!theywadbidnaebetter,
  thanletthemanceoutowrethewater,
  thenupamongthaelakesandseas,
  they'llmakwhatrulesandlawstheyplease:
  somedaringhancocke,orafranklin,
  maysettheirhighlandbluida-ranklin
  somewashingtonagainmayheadthem,
  orsomemontgomery,fearless,leadthem,
  tillgodknowswhatmaybeeffected
  whenbysuchheadsandheartsdirected,
  poordunghillsonsofdirtandmire
  maytopatricianrightsaspire!
  naesagenorthnow,norsagersackville,
  towatchandpremiero'erthepackvile,—
  an'wharewillyegethowesandclintons
  tobringthemtoarightrepentance—
  tocowetherebelgeneration,
  an'savethehonouro'thenation?
  they,an'bed-d!whatrighthaethey
  tomeat,orsleep,orlighto'day?
  farless—toriches,pow'r,orfreedom,
  butwhatyourlordshiplikestogiethem?
  buthear,mylord!glengarry,hear!
  yourhand'sowrelighttothem,ifear
  yourfactors,grieves,trustees,andbailies,
  icannasaybuttheydogaylies
  theylayasidea'tendermercies,
  an'tirhehallionstothebirses
  yetwhilethey'reonlypoind'tandherriet,
  they'llkeeptheirstubbornhighlandspirit:
  butsmashthem!crashthema'tospails,
  an'rotthedyvorsi'thejails!
  theyoungdogs,swingethemtothelabour
  letwarkan'hungermakthemsober!
  thehizzies,ifthey'reaughtlinsfawsont,
  letthemindrury-lanebelesson'd!
  an'ifthewivesan'dirtybrats
  comethigginatyourdoorsan'yetts,
  flaffinwi'duds,an'greywi'beas',
  frightinawayyourducksan'geese
  getoutahorsewhiporajowler,
  thelangestthong,thefiercestgrowler,
  an'garthetatter'dgypsiespack
  wi'a'theirbastardsontheirback!
  goon,mylord!ilangtomeetyou,
  an'inmyhouseathametogreetyou
  wi'commonlordsyeshannamingle,
  thebenmostneukbesidetheingle,
  atmyrighthan'assignedyourseat,
  'tweenherod'shipan'polycrate:
  orifyouonyourstationtarrow,
  betweenalmagroandpizarro,
  aseat,i'msureye'rewelldeservin't
  an'tillyecome—yourhumbleservant,
  beelzebub.
  june1st,annomundi,5790.

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